


Red and Gold

by Hardrada



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:00:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27307381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hardrada/pseuds/Hardrada
Summary: Jim and Bones are sent to a distant outpost following a bit of an -incident.  They find illness and misery and corruption
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Leonard "Bones" McCoy
Comments: 3
Kudos: 22





	Red and Gold

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first part of a two parter so this is mainly setting it up. 
> 
> _This fic is set in the same universe as World Apart - so mentions of what happened with the Nerada and mentions of Annie. Most importantly though, Jim is young and he’s mixed up and he’s volatile and pretty immature. So he’s my version of Kirk, I suppose. He’s got a long way to go before he becomes the captain of a starship._
> 
> _As ever, massive thanks for all comments and kudos. I appreciate every single one of them more than I can say, because I love the thought that you love these two as much as I do._
> 
> _They continue to keep me sane in an increasingly mad world._
> 
> _The title comes from a song called ‘Why Worry?’ by Dire Straits. It’s one of the most romantic songs I have ever heard in my life. It doesn’t really connect in any way with this fic, but the romance of it makes me think of these two and the fact that as long as they have each other, nothing else really matters. All the rest really is by the way._

**Baby when I get down I turn to you  
And you make sense of what I do  
I know it isn't hard to say  
But baby just when this world seems mean and cold  
Our love comes shining red and gold  
And all the rest is by the way**

_“Oh, Dr McCoy’s the strong one”._

_“Dr McCoy is the only reason that kid is allowed near a starship”._

_“It’s totally one-sided. Without McCoy, Kirk would be in the gutter”_

_“They’re both weak. They just prop each other up”._

__

Jim could hear every single comment, and knew perfectly well that the table of drunks were aware of who was in the bar. He sensed his companion’s anger and he reached out with his foot, kicking slightly, shaking his head as Bones looked up.

“Don’t”, he said. “They want you to react, they want you to be the hero and stand up for me. That would only prove that I’m useless without you, and more to the point, Starfleet would hang you out if you got into a bar fight”. He shook his head again. “They’ll stop soon enough”.

“They’ll stop even faster if I smack them in the mouth”, Bones growled, eyebrows drawn down in a ferocious scowl. Other people would be worried by that look; it made Jim smile fondly.

“That’s exactly what they want you to do”, he said. “They clearly don’t know you; if they did they’d know that they’re playing with fire right now…” His expression suddenly changed and his gaze shifted to look over Bones’ shoulder. “Oh no, oh they wouldn’t be so stupid…” He winced as a hand landed on Bones’ shoulder. Bones didn’t respond, but his eyes locked with Jim’s, and Jim recognised that his temper was close to snapping. Bones was exhausted; tonight was supposed to be break from routine. When Bones was tired his temper was held by the thinnest thread, and that thread was fraying rapidly. This was only going to end one way…

“Oh look, guys, it’s the golden couple!” The man who had accosted Bones sniggered nastily. “Hero doctor and the legend’s loony kid. Don’t look so golden to me; look really ordinary”. He sniggered again and bent down to say very quietly into Bones’ ear. “At least he’s pretty. Does he look pretty you’ve got him on his knees?”

“Oh shit…” Jim moved quickly and stood up, approaching the young man. He knew this type; in another life, it was him. “Hey, come on”, he said, holding up both hands in a ‘back off’ gesture, “we’re just here for a quiet drink, we don’t want any trouble”.

“Come on, Ade, leave them alone”. One of the young man’s friends, obviously slightly more sober that the others, approached. “It’s not worth it”.

“No, I wanna know”, the one called Ade smirked, his attention wandering to Jim now. Jim could see how absolutely hammered the young man was; whatever had caused this it was definitely more than just drink. This young man was high as a kite and Jim sighed inwardly. Drunks were so much easier to handle than skank heads. “What do you say, pretty boy, are you that pretty when you’re on your knees?”

To his horror, Jim could feel a very smart remark heading from his hind brain to the tip of his tongue. It didn’t seem to matter how far away he thought he had moved; that wild kid was still in his system somewhere. He bit his tongue until the remark, cross at being ignored, wandered away. Only then did Jim feel safe in opening his mouth. “Guys, come on”, he said again. He wanted to glance over his shoulder to ensure the bartender had called security. He knew that would be the case, but he wanted to be sure. He felt Bones’ hand in the small of his back, pushing at him, trying to get him out of the way, but he knew that would be the worst thing he could do. That would simply cause Ade, the boy in front of him, make a few more smart remarks. Nope, he had intervened, so he had to see this through.

“We’re just here to have a quiet drink”, he said, deliberately keeping his voice calm, even with Volcano McCoy behind him. He looked at Ade’s friends. “Do you think you could take your friend away? I think perhaps he’s had a little bit too much - something”.

With hindsight, it was the _something_ that did it. Ade’s reactions were slow, which meant that Jim had plenty of time to dodge the punch that came towards him. Much as he wanted to, he restrained himself from retaliating, simply looked over to Ade’s friends again. Ade, thrown off balance by his flailing handiwork, took a few moments to recover.

“You know security’s on its way, right?” Jim said, both to Ade and to the rest of the bar. “Just go now”.

“Yeah, come on Ade”. The girl who had spoken before broke from the rest of her friends and came forward, hooking a hand under Ade’s arm. “Come on, you’re making a fool of yourself”.

__

“And then?” Admiral Pike looked down at the report in front of him and then back up at Jim and Bones.

“Well sir, then Ade punched Del - the girl who was trying to get him out of the bar, and…” Jim closed his eyes and sighed silently.

“And so you punched him”. Pike finished.

“Yes, sir”, Jim said miserably.

“Misplaced chivalry, do you think?”

“I didn’t mean to”, Jim protested, shifting minutely in his dress uniform. “But he hit her, and that’s - well, that’s just not right”.

“I admire the thought, whilst deploring the action”, Pike said. “Did you not think she would be able to stand up for herself?”

“No, it wasn’t that!” Jim protested. “It just - you don’t hit people when they’re trying to save your ass from doing something stupid”. He closed his eyes again, realising the trap he had just walked into. Pike leaped on the chance and proceeded to savage it into the ground.

“So why did you push Dr McCoy away and tell him to - let me see”. Pike made a great show of studying the report. “Where is it, where is it? Ah yes, here we are. ‘Fuck off’ was the phrase”.

Jim made a final, albeit feeble attempt to come out of this smelling of something other than shit. “Because he would have killed the kid”.

“Ah, so you saved your partner from a charge of murder? Selfless, Mr Kirk. Selfless”. He placed his hands flat against the report and looked down for a moment. When he looked up, his eyes were soft and Jim breathed a little more easily.

“Son, you have a hair trigger temper on you, and you need to learn to control that. No charges are going to be pressed because the young man can’t remember a thing, and amazingly there appear to be no witnesses. That black eye you are currently sporting is clearly a spontaneous stigmata”. He gestured at the seat across from him, and Jim slid into it.

“But you have to learn, you absolutely _have_ to learn from this”. Pike stopped and stared at him. “The Kirks have a streak of recklessness in them that makes them both genius and disaster area. Your father was the same”. He held up a hand. “I know you don’t like being compared to him, but there it is. You’re his child, and it shows on occasions like this”. He put his hand back on his desk and seemed to be examining the backs of both of them for an inordinately long time.

“No charges will be pressed”, he reiterated, “but consider this an informal warning. At the moment you’re safe; you’re pair-bonded to a hero and you carry the Kirk name. But you are very young and very inexperienced, and you are - because of those two things - public property. The pressure on you is twice as hard as for any other cadet. And unfortunately that means that when you are seen as doing something wrong, then it can’t always be swept under the carpet. There are many people who think you’re far too arrogant and have only got this far because of your name and because of Dr McCoy. This will only confirm them in those beliefs. You have to keep your nose clean from here on in. Do you hear me?”

“I hear you”, Jim confirmed, wanting to say so much more but for once managing to keep his mouth firmly shut. Pike heard him anyway.

“I know that you were actually protecting the kid - Ade. If Dr McCoy had joined in or had responded to the first round of comments, then things could have been a great deal worse. For a doctor, that man just has the worst temper”.

“No”, Jim said immediately. “He really doesn’t. He’s just very, very good at making people think he does”.

“Oh, he does”, Pike responded. “Just not with you”. He did that twinkle thing with his eyes that always made Jim go slightly soft inside, and shook his head. “I’m having to be seen to do something, you do understand? Even though there are no charges, it’s widely know what happened, and if you’re seen to get away with it, then it won’t sit well with various people who are senior to us both. So the best thing I have come up with is this”. He pushed a folded paper across the desk and motioned for Jim to pick it up.

Jim unfolded it and quickly scanned what was written there. He had to read it twice, and then folded it carefully and clenched it tightly. He kept his head down for a moment or two and then looked up.

“It feels as if we’re being blamed”.

“No”, Pike said immediately. “This is politics, and you two are perhaps the victims. Nobody who was there think you did anything wrong, all the reports say that you tried to calm the situation. The young man who challenged you was high on drugs and out of control; you did the best you could under the circumstances. Now, you could just brazen this out, and I know that both of you would do that. But this isn’t about you brazening anything out. You are on very, very thin ice with a lot of people. I think the best thing to do is to take you out of the eyeline of certain people who dislike you and give them time to calm down. You’re a fifteen-minute wonder, son. Something else will come along and this will be forgotten”. He shrugged and slumped slightly. Jim suddenly saw that Pike had aged since their first meeting in the bar, and he realised that he didn’t have the heart to argue with the man who was the closest thing to a father he ever had. Pike was simply trying to look after him, and all Jim ever seemed to do was fight against him. He knew of some of the flack Pike had caught for him whilst he had been at the Academy and how he had kept faith with him. Maybe he should just shut his face and go with this. It was something Bones would enjoy, probably. And he’d find something in it, something to learn.

“Thank you, sir”, he said. “Thank you for everything you do for me. I know that I’m a pain”.

“You really are, Kirk, you really, really are”, Pike said, a bit too readily for Jim’s liking, “but I think you’re worth it. You have something in you and I want to bring that out, but you have so many walls to break through first, and so much - wildness - that needs to be exorcised. The higher-ups must be able to see that you’re not getting away with this”.

“Sir”. Jim stood up slowly. He stood to attention until Pike waved him away, then he turned and exited. As the door hissed close behind him, he held out the paper to his right without even bothering to look. It was taken from him and Bones scanned it.

“Oh”, was all he said. “Well, fuck”. He put his arm around Jim’s shoulders. “How do you feel?”

“Kind of hard done by, if I’m honest”. Jim reached into his pocket and took out the small transmitter he had taken with him into Pike’s office so that Bones could eavesdrop on the conversation. “But I suppose I understand why it’s happening. You?”

“Same”. Bones took a quick glance around and then pulled Jim in for a quick kiss. Absolutely forbidden whilst in uniform. “But at least we’re going together”.

Jim, the optimistic side of his nature never damped down for too long, grinned and nodded. “That’s what’s really important. I’m not being split up from you again, not after the _Nerada_ ”. That whole awful time was still enough to make him break into a cold sweat, and he had decided then that he was never going to be parted from Bones again. In one way, those drunks had been right. He would fall apart without Bones.

“Come on”, he said. “Let me get out of this uniform. We’re off-shift anyway”.

__

Some hour later Jim, freshly showered and dressed in soft sweats and a worn out sweatshirt that had once belonged Bones, lay on his belly on the floor, studying his PADD.

“So, we’re going to a station called Omega. Oh, that fills me with joy. It’s on the edge of the Mallorian nebula, so I’m pretty certain that you go past the boonies and the middle of nowhere into the outer edge of nowhere, and then you seem to keep going for a bit longer. Even at warp that’s a month-long trip. They’re really sending us out as far as they can without us falling off the edge of space”. He scrolled for another moment or two, aware of Bones’ gaze on him, fond and full of warmth. “Here we go… blah, blah… report to Admiral T’kal… wonder what he’s done wrong to be stuck out there … blah, blah… two day trip to the outpost where you’ll be offering medical help to a settlement who are suffering from all the fun stuff - vitamin deficiencies, TB, rickets… basic Victorian Earth illnesses… you’ll make them all better, I’ll help the engineers who are already there to rig up enough tech for them to be able to look after themselves. So basically I’m the engineers’ bitch”. He huffed and rolled over onto his back. “You know, this could be kind of fun”.

“Attaboy”, Bones said in his own version of agreement. “Trust you to think being a bitch could be a good thing”. He prodded at Jim’s side with his bare foot. “It could be a whole lot worse, and it doesn’t seem to have hit you what the main advantage is”.

“Lots of time with you?”

“Well that, obviously. But we’ll be away from here, no studying for - how long?”

Jim looked back at the PADD looking for the relevant information. “Fuck me, three months. Month travel each way, give or take, and then a month in the back of beyond”.

“Well, think about the age of some of the higher ups, as Pike called them. By the time we get back they’ll have forgotten who we are, and we’ll have a whole new set of skills. We’re only in limbo now anyway, waiting for the _Enterprise_ to finish being refitted. Maybe it’s safest to be somewhere else”.

“Safest?” Jim raised his eyebrows. “Meaning?”

Bones laughed and rolled off the couch and more or less onto Jim, who huffed but didn’t exactly fight him off.

“My hero”, he said, fluttering his eyelashes. “Protecting me from the nasty man”.

“Protecting the nasty man from you, dickweed”, Jim protested, stretching his arms out above his head. “You would have killed him. I was the soul of discretion”. He paused. “No, not discretion, maybe tact”.

“Both don’t seem like words I would use when describing you”. Bones reached up and took hold of one of Jim’s hands, linking their fingers together.

Jim laughed softly and hooked his free hand around Bones’ neck, pulling him down for a kiss. “They weren’t wrong though”, he said eventually. “I’m nothing without you. I don’t even have a ship, actually. I just kind of hitched a ride on the _Enterprise_ when you think about it”.

“Oh, what nonsense”, said Bones so primly that Jim snorted. “You’re just a bit - chaotic. That whole thing with the _Nerada_ where you went loopy - your word, remember? That was guilt, and you know it”. He raised Jim’s hand and kissed the subtle gold ring that sat on his finger. “One good thing came out of it”.

“Yeah”, Jim agreed. “That”. He stilled and looked up at Bones, taking it all in; the deep-set eyes that were so, so full of warmth (why did nobody else see that?) the dark hair that was currently doing very strange things as it appeared to be making a break for freedom in all directions; the amazing bone structure with cheekbones that most people could only dream about, and just - that face. That face attached to that body. “Christ”, he said suddenly. “I got so damn lucky with you”.

“Yes you did”, Bones agreed, smiling down at Jim. “And don’t forget it”.

“Not even when we’re old and grey”, Jim promised. “You won’t go grey, I bet. You’ll just be irritatingly beautiful all your life”.

“Frankly I don’t care if I end up looking like some wizened old crone in an ancient folk tale”, Bones said. “Just so long as you’re still where you belong”.

“Oh, that’s a promise”, said Jim fervently, pulling his hand free and wrapping both arms around Bones, pulling him close. He shivered even though the room was warm, and Bones’ weight was welcome and heavy on top of him. “I promise”. The kiss that followed was his way of sealing that promise, and he lost himself completely in taste and touch and the sounds - the way their clothes rustled as they moved against each other; the sounds he could hear himself making as Bones’ mouth moved to the spot just below his ear that invariably caused him to whimper. He heard Bones huff a laugh and change his method of assault, his teeth nipping at Jim’s ear, gripping the lobe and biting gently before suddenly releasing him and continuing his journey down Jim’s neck, pausing at his favourite zones. At the same time his hands slid under Jim’s sweatshirt, his nails scraping up and down Jim’s belly, dipping tantalisingly lower with each stroke, until Jim was pushing his hips up, panting and wordlessly begging Bones to go further.

Bones ignored the blatant pleading and continued indulging himself. He pushed the sweatshirt up and off, tossing it to one side, pausing only to smile into Jim’s eyes before dipping his head again and getting on with the job in hand, so to speak. There was nothing - absolutely _nothing_ \- in existence better than this, better than having Jim a helpless puddle of lust completely under his control, and he had absolutely no intention of being rushed.

“Hush your noise, love”, he said, his lips against Jim’s ear, making him, in his over-stimulated state, squeak embarrassingly. “Come on, hush your noise for me”. He kissed him again, but Jim was beginning to reach the stage of being unable to respond, but that was okay, his mouth was wet and hot and perfect and Bones slowly fucked it with his tongue, feeling Jim’s hands clench and unclench, gripping and twisting at the bunched up sweatshirt Bones still wore. “You’re so beautiful”, Bones whispered, his voice low and slow. “So fucking wanton lying underneath me like this. So open for me. You’d let me do anything right now”. Jim was way past speech, but he did open lust-dulled eyes and raise one hand, clenching it in Bones’ hair. Bones laughed softly and reached up to release it. “I know”, he said softly. “It’s okay, love, I know. But we have a long way to go yet”. 

__

Jim lay sprawled on the floor, absolutely spent, the sweat drying on his body, chest heaving. He had one hand firmly clenched around Bones’ wrist, the other in his own hair, and he was grinning like a fool.

“Jesus”, he said eventually. “Jesus, Bones. What you do to me…”

Bones, still out of breath himself could only manage a grunt of satisfaction.

“That was - I’ve lost all motor function”, Jim decided. “Just leave me here to die”. With a huge effort he rolled over until he was nose to nose with Bones. “Thanks”, he said. “That was - I really needed that”.

“I noticed”. Bones smiled, his eyes half closed in satisfaction and sleepiness. “We need to clean up and get to bed”. He cupped Jim’s face and smiled again before kissing him softly. “I think I’ll keep you for a while”.

“Gee, thanks”, Jim responded, echoing the smile. “You’re really such a romantic soul”. Bones snorted, but Jim shook his head. “Actually, you genuinely are”, he insisted. “I know you don’t like it, but you are”. He kissed Bones’ cheek. “But only with me. Let’s keep it that way”.

“Deal”. Bones reached out and wrapped Jim in his arms, pulling him close. “Deal, my love”.

They lay in silence, long enough for Bones’ breathing to deepen and settle. Jim, whose body was heavy with satiation, was quite happy to lie with him. At some point he would get cold and have to do something about it, but not for a little while. His mind was far from sleepy though, and he let himself think about what was to come.

Pike had managed to finagle this, he knew that much. It was miles away from being a punishment. It was just a way to get them below the parapet for a little while. Bones was a hero, and he was just the nutty kid who had been lucky enough to snare him. But he was a nutty kid with a big name, and that gave him some notoriety. They were public property after the _Nerada_ and those stupid kids had been attracted because of that. Jim hoped it wasn’t going to be like that forever. That was one of the reasons he wanted to be out in deep space; to get away from the legend. As long as he was with Bones, he didn’t really care, though. He would follow Bones wherever he led.

“Kid, you okay?” Bones’ voice made Jim jump. “Don’t start over-thinking anything”.

“I’m not”, Jim said, offended. “I’m doing just the right amount of thinking”. He laughed. “I’m mentally packing”. Bones started to laugh, and after a moment of offended silence, Jim joined in. “Rude”, he muttered.

__

They were billeted aboard the _Sun Tzu_ , due to leave for the Omega station within the next week, taking them much-needed supplies, and two humans, both of whom still swung between excitement and indignation at having to go at all.

On the night before they were due to leave, they decided to go out again, to the same bar for a farewell celebration. Some of their friends from the Academy would be there - not so many as there once would have been, which Jim noted with sadness. Bones’ crewmates from the _Enterprise_ were there, and Uhura and Jim spent a happy hour arguing about absolutely nothing, in that way of best friends. Then Jim kept a promise he had made and kissed Sulu on the lips, much to Sulu’s surprise and that of his husband Ben. With hindsight, Jim realised that he should have perhaps explained himself first, but both Sulu and Ben took it in good part, and in fact Ben claimed a kiss for himself, at which point Jim, who was nothing if not generous, decided to share himself around the group, declared that every single one of them was his new best friend, and kissed each of them. Most of them tolerated it, a couple of them looked at him as if he were mad, and Bones, who had been watching him like a hawk, noted the half dozen or so beings who joined in a little over-enthusiastically, including the Aurelian girl who very clearly used her tongue. Jim, who by this point had drunk rather more than was good for him, didn’t appear to notice, and simply smiled when she also grabbed his ass. Since Bones considered that particular ass to be his property, he began to bristle, but then he saw the look of absolute oblivion on Jim’s face, and left him to it. Jim didn’t bed-hop anymore and would be appalled to think Bones had even for a second let that thought cross his mind. 

“He’s yours, heart and soul”. The voice in his ear startled him so much he may have actually left the ground. Admiral Pike slid into the seat next to him and they sat in companionable silence watching Jim as he held court. “He knows how to inspire affection and irritation in equal measure, doesn’t he?”

“Do you know, I really don’t think he knows he’s doing it”, said Bones. “It’s just how he is. He is willing to like everyone, and he wants everyone to like him”.

“He’s a good kid”. Pike did that thing that only he seemed to be able to do. He simply raised a hand and a beer materialised in front of him. He raised the glass and toasted Bones and then waved the glass in Jim’s direction. “He’s got a wild side to him that worries me sometimes, but then I remember his past and I kind of understand”.

“He did have a bitch of an upbringing”, Bones agreed. “It’s what makes him flare sometimes I think. And then he’s got the legend thing on top of that. Admiral, he does okay”.

“That’s thanks in great part to you”, Pike said. “He needed grounding, and that’s what you do. As I said, he’s yours, heart and soul, and I’m glad. I feel as if I can let him go now. I can pass him over to you”.

Bones smiled. “I thought that was what you were doing when you officiated at our marriage ceremony”.

“It’s taken me this long to give him up in here”. Pike tapped his chest. “It’s tough watching your kids grow”. He took a mouthful of beer before continuing. “How is he feeling about what’s happening?”

“He’s okay”, Bones said. “He was swinging for a little while between being angry and looking forward to it”.

“And you? What do you think about it?”

Bones shrugged. “I get it”, he said. “It’s politics. Jim doesn’t do politics. He works with his gut and then his heart. His head is usually trying to catch up”.

“And you?”

“Me? Oh, I do head first I think”.

“Except with him”. Pike smiled, and Bones raised his glass in acknowledgement. 

“Yeah”, he agreed, “except with him. Wasn’t expecting him”.

“Look after him”, Pike said, unexpectedly. “He’s got a ways to go in the growing process. He’s going to be quite something one day, but he needs looking after along the way”.

“I’ll catch him every time”, Bones said, realising that he wasn’t at all embarrassed to be having this conversation. Pike was a damn good man, and he loved Jim. Therefore, as far as Bones was concerned, he was okay. He looked at Jim, who at that point appeared to be sitting on the knee of a very large gentleman who was one of the security team on board the _Enterprise_. In fact it could be the one Jim referred to as ‘Cupcake’. Be that as it may, Officer Cupcake looked absolutely dazed. Bones knew how he felt.

“He is extraordinarily drunk”, Pike commented after a moment. “He’s going to regret this”.

“One of the many annoying things about him is that he doesn’t get hungover”, Bones responded. “He may feel a bit rough for an hour or so, but he won’t be hungover. He’s an absolute lightweight when it comes to how much he can drink - he’s like this on about three beers - but he doesn’t suffer. There’s so much about him that irritates”. His eyes flicked over the rest of the bar, seemingly casual. But he was keeping an eye on a particular table, because at that table he could see Ade and his silly little friends again. But this time they were in cadet uniforms and they looked as if they’d had haircuts. Could they possibly have seen the light? If not, and if they made one move on Jim, then Bones was going to smack their silly heads together. Although, looking back at Jim, it seemed as if the idiots would have to get through the newly-besotted Officer Cupcake, who now had his arm around Jim’s waist, and possibly - could it actually be? - had his fingers on the hem of Jim’s shirt. Hmm…

Pike must have followed Bones’ gaze. “First years”, he said, nodding at the table. “They joined up when we put out the call for new recruits after the Nerada incident. Do you know them?”

Bones thought about it for a moment. Should he tell Pike who they were and mark their cards for them before they even started their careers? Tempting, but then - these kids had answered when Starfleet had called for help. Why ruin it for them? Just so long as they kept their distance…

“No”, he said. “Just thinking how young they look”.

Pike laughed. “Ain’t that the truth”.

With a final smooch that made their friends cheer with laughter, Jim finally peeled himself away from Officer Cupcake, who hastily crossed his legs. He looked around the room until he saw Bones, but then his head snapped back as he too saw Ade. Bones saw him actually quiver as his body tried to change direction whilst his mind tried to keep him moving towards Bones, and with a nod and muttered comment to Pike, Bones stood up and made his way across the room, fishing for and catching Jim’s eyes. He shook his head very slightly and Jim frowned.

“It’s them!” Jim said angrily when Bones got to him. “Those life-ruining fuckers”.

“Oh, don’t be dramatic”, Bones said. “Just leave them, Jim. They’re part of Starfleet now, they’re here to help us recover. Come on”. He got between Jim and the table and began to shepherd him away.

Ade, who had been watching the raucous celebrations with an expression that was hard to quantify, stood up. Bones tensed as he turned to face him. He was willing to leave the kid alone, but if he said or did one thing out of line, then - not so much.

“Dr McCoy”. Ade stood before him, hands clasped behind his back, eyes not quite meeting Bones’ stare. “I want to apologise to you and Cadet Kirk. I was out of line”.

“Yep, you were”, Bones said. “It’s fine, kid, but grow up. Learn not to make personal remarks. And stay off the drugs. They fry your brain”.

Ade coloured and nodded. “I’m off them, sir. I’m in a programme”. He glanced over to the _Enterprise_ crowd and nodded towards them. “I was watching you, watching them, and it’s what I want. That friendship is something to look forward to”.

“It is”. Jim pushed past Bones. “It’s one of the best things you can have. Don’t be an asshole, okay?”

“Okay”. Ade paused. “I am sorry”.

“Nobody got hurt”, Bones said.

“Excuse me?” Jim said, and Bones grinned. Even Ade’s mouth twitched.

“Nobody got seriously hurt”, Bones amended. “Aim for the stars, kid”, he said to Ade. “Even if you miss, you’ll still be soaring”. With a nod he turned away, catching Jim’s hand and leading the way out of the bar, raising a hand to the crew and nodding to Pike.

“I’m actually pleased we saw those assholes”, said Jim, staggering a bit as the fresh air hit him. “At least they’re doing something good now”.

“Mmm”. Bones heaved in a huge lungful of air. It was turning cool now, just a hint of fall. His favourite time of the year. And tomorrow they were heading for the boonies. But with luck, they’d be back for the winter, and although he would never admit it even under torture, he was looking forward to long dark afternoons on the couch with his personal radiator.

“We’ll be fine”, Jim said, reading his mind. “We’re together, and that’s all that matters. Treat it as an adventure”.

Bones rolled his eyes. “I’m not twelve, James”.

“No, Leonard you most certainly are not. Because that would make me a proper pervert”.

Bones laughed. “A ‘proper’ pervert? As opposed to what, an improper one?”

“Oh, I’m already one of those”. Jim smiled evilly and Bones laughed again.

“Come on”, he said. “We have to be up early tomorrow”. He put his arm around Jim’s shoulders and in turn Jim wrapped his arm around Bones’ waist and they made their slow way home.

__

“Well, this is a shithole and no mistake”, Bones said in disgust as he dumped his bag onto his cot. His _single_ cot, because the Sun Tzu was so old that it only had single beds since it harked from the time when crew members were expected to be puritans. So although they were in married quarters, the beds were single and Bones was mightily unimpressed. Jim, on the other hand, had dumped his own belongings (“Bags me near the window”) and wandered out of the cabin again without a word. Bones had no idea where he had gone but frankly it could be anywhere. He could be checking out the bar, he could be checking out the engine room. He could be checking out the chief engineer’s ass for all he knew. He’d roll up in his own good time.

Bones sighed and looked around. “A shithole”, he said again just for emphasis and then he too left the depressing cabin and found his way to the medbay.

Where he found another shithole. The CMO, Dr Ouimette, was a small, harassed woman, who had no obvious organisational skills, with the result that med supplies were all over the place which made Bones twitch in annoyance. He knew that he could turn Jim loose on this place and within ten minutes everything would be packed away in a way that may seem slightly haphazard but made perfect sense to both Jim and Bones. But he had to remember that he was not the CMO on this ship; he was here to assist. Yeah, assist with putting shit away if he had his way.

“Dr Ouimette”, he said formally. “Leonard McCoy”.

“Oh, it’s a pleasure”, Dr Ouimette held out her hand for Bones to take. “And it’s Rachanda, please”.

“Rachanda”, Bones said. “I’m Leonard. Len. I’m here to help you in any way I can”.

“I’m afraid things are in a bit of a state” Rachanda admitted, glancing around. “Coming back from our last mission we had a dreadful outbreak of Sindaran flu. The last thing I had time for was to tidy up. Even my medical staff came down with it”.

“Nasty”. Bones quickly checked through the filing cabinet in his mind marked _Jim’s Recent Maladies_. Okay, he had never had this particular strain of flu. He’d trap him in a corner later and innoculate him. They were not going to introduce themselves to this ship by chasing each other down corridors. Once had been enough, thank you.

“Well, any help I can give”, he said. “Just let me know. We’re with you to the Omega station, so we have a journey ahead of us”.

“I’m hoping my medical staff will all be fit very soon”, Rachanda said. “Then I can get on top of things again”.

Bones couldn’t resist it. “My husband, Jim? He could sort this out for you really quickly. He has a system all his own”.

Rachanda blinked. “Oh. Oh, well that would be kind. I rather thought Mr Kirk was going to be in the engineering bay”.

“He is, but he will probably be up here quite a lot for various reasons. He’s - he - has been known to be somewhat accident prone”.

“I’ve heard”. Rachanda smiled. Bones smiled in return and rolled his eyes, making Rachanda actually laugh. It looked as if she hadn’t laughed for a while, so he was pleased about that.

He got back to their ~~shithole~~ cabin an hour or so later, but still no sign of Jim. He began to feel a bit annoyed as they had yet to meet Captain Shah who had been in charge of the _Sun Tzu_ since the day it had first left port. 

“Oh fuck it”, he said. “Find me when you’re ready”. He left the cabin again and ran, quite literally into Jim, who was just coming in, but was looking over his shoulder as he finished off a conversation with a woman in engineering red.

“Hi!” he said brightly as he peeled himself off Bones’ chest. “Where have you been?”

“Same at you”.

“Don’t get shirty”. Jim smiled. “Been to the engineering bay. I’m going to spend a lot of my time being a grease monkey on this trip, but that’s okay. Sasha -” he pointed in the direction the engineer had taken, “was just showing me some of the weak points. What about you?”

“Ditto in the medbay. I need you to do the tidying thing with the boxes”.

“Okay”. Jim looked both ways and then reached up to cup Bones’ face. “You look real tired, my Bones. Are you?”

“I’m fine”, Bones lied. In fact he was quite suddenly absolutely exhausted. “Come on, let’s find Captain Shah and get this over with”.

They met in the Captain’s ready room. As a cadet, Jim had no right to be on the bridge, and technically nor did Bones. Although his rank gave him the right, his role in the ship precluded it. He was in a very weird kind of limbo, so he had decided that he would simply align himself with Jim. He wouldn’t go anywhere Jim couldn’t access; he wasn’t about to rub in the fact that Jim was completely without rank.

Shah was, as Jim said later, “a proper fucking piece of work”. He was arrogant, he clearly ran his ship through intimidation, and it was obvious that his crew, although they respected him, had very little affection for him. Jim doubted very much if they would follow him into hell, the way the crew of the _Enterprise_ followed Pike.

On the plus side, Shah made it clear he had no desire to see either Jim or Bones; they were passengers; they were there to make themselves useful, nothing more. He certainly wanted nothing to do with the cadet. He had actually known George Kirk, and had disliked him immensely for reasons he had never tried to analyse; the man had been too good-looking, too kind, too impetuous, too downright _nice_ , and Shah had loathed everything about him. He had regretted Kirk’s death, but only because it had turned him into a legend. He took one look at Jim’s face, saw an echo of George and wanted nothing to do with him. He simply gave them the “this is how I run my ship” speech and sent them on their way.

“Well, what a darling”. Jim said as they made their way back down the corridor. “Glad we won’t have anything to do with him”.

“Mmm”. Jim stopped dead in the hall and stood in front of Bones.

“What’s wrong?” he said. He put his hand on Bones’ face, and his expression changed. “You’re really hot! You didn’t feel this hot before! Shit, you’re sick!”

“Well I sure hope it’s something you’ve already had, or you’re in the shit”, Bones croaked. His voice had apparently decided to take a vacation.

“Fuck that”, Jim said bluntly. “Let’s get you to medbay”.

Frankly, it was embarrassing. Rachanda was still standing more or less where she had been when Bones left, still clearly overwhelmed by the task when Jim burst in. Jim always ‘burst’ in. He could never just walk into a room. He burst in, his energy took it over and people always just looked at him like startled deer. Rachanda was no exception.

“This is Jim”, Bones said. Or attempted to say. What came out was - well, nothing really. Jim looked at him, all worried eyes and frowns.

“I’m Jim”, he said to Rachanda. “Hi. Bones is ill. Can you fix him?”

Rachanda blinked. Another typical reaction to Jim. He tended to get straight to the point. After all, Bones seemed to remember “I want you to fuck me so hard I can’t breathe” was one of the first things Jim had said to him. First day they met. Off the shuttle, to the Academy, papers signed, rooms assigned, bar for a drink, alley for a fuck. Very direct boy, James. Bones sniggered and then stopped, vaguely appalled that he may have said something. Then he remembered that he didn’t have a voice.

“Has he been sick?” Rachanda asked finally snapping back into focus.

“Not yet. Is he likely to be?”

“Not at all. Put him on the bed”. Jim flashed an evil grin at Bones and helped him over to the bio bed. 

“He makes a terrible patient”, Jim confided. “He once punched me when I said he was looking a bit peaky. Accidentally punched me, you understand. He flailed and I was in the way…” He wrinkled his nose. “Sorry. I babble when I’m nervous”.

“That’s okay”, said Rachanda. “I’ll make a point of avoiding him when he starts flailing. Methodically she began her examination and then studied the results. Jim leaned over Bones and held his hand, stroking the sweaty hair back from his forehead.

“I’m here, my Bones”, he said softly. “You’ll be fine. I’ll take care of you”.

Bones felt - odd. He never got ill, and all of a sudden he could hardly remember his own name. He clung to Jim’s hand, frightened at his weakness and helplessness. “Jim”, he said, or tried to. But Jim heard him.

“I’m here, love, I’m here”.

“Okay”, Rachanda finished assessing the results of her tests. “Don’t worry, he’s going to be fine. He has a chest infection that’s been hiding for a little while. Something as simple as the change in air pressure may have finally brought it out. More than that though, he’s worn out. He’s just exhausted”.

“He works too hard”, Jim said. “I keep telling him he’s working too hard”.

“He needs to rest”, Rachanda said flatly. “I want him on 72 hours medical leave starting now. I’ll give him a few shots that will help the infection, and I’ll give him some vitamin shots to perk him up a little. But you’re going to have to make sure he rests”. Rachanda glared at Jim. “You said your name is Jim. I’m guessing that you’re his husband?”

Jim nodded. “I’ll take care of him. He won’t leave the room for the next three days. He won’t leave the bed”.

Bones could hear Jim, but from a distance, and he wanted to agree that he would be quite happy to stay in bed for three days, but really he had work to do…

“I know he’s due to come and start assisting you”. Jim glanced around, finally taking in the mess. “He couldn’t work in this”, he said bluntly. “I’ll fix it”.

“I’m sorry?” Rachanda looked astounded. This young man was a cadet and he was speaking to her like that?

“I said, I’ll fix this mess”. Jim stood up. “You give him those shots, Doctor, and let him rest here for an hour, would that be possible? I’ll fix the mess and then I’ll take him to our quarters”.

Rachanda simply stood there. How do you argue with a force of nature? Jim looked at her, head cocked, full of a happy expectation that she would do as he wanted, and almost against her will, she turned and began to prepare the hypos. Jim picked up one of Bones’ hand and kissed it. “You’ll be okay”, he said. “I’ll look after you”.

Bones lay there, eyes closed. Now he had given in to it, he just couldn’t seem to open them again. He could hear Jim, he could feel his warmth, he wanted to hold him and tell him that he was going to be fine, because he could hear the worry even if nobody else could. But he just couldn’t. He listened as Jim began to thump around the medbay, opening cupboard doors and slamming them again. At the same time Rachanda pressed a hypo gently against his neck and he heard the hiss as it was activated. He didn’t feel it, of course. Jim was the only person who ever felt real pain when he was stuck with a hypo. Jim was so - strange, he mused. You could knock him down so many times and he would bounce back up, but he was so utterly damaged inside as well. He had an immune system that didn’t seem to know what to do and occasionally fought against him. And yet - he warmed Bones right down to his cockles. Whatever cockles were. His were warmed by Jim.

“Cockles”, he croaked, and Rachanda leaned over him. 

“What?” 

“He warms my cockles”, Bones said.

“Oh… Good”.

“I warm his what?” Jim’s voice came from very far away.

“His cockles, apparently”.

“Glad to hear it. We knew an English guy once, and he used to say that”. Another brief interval of slamming and thumping. “Okay, Doctor, all done. I’ve put a quick programme onto the computer so that you’ll be able to find anything that you need, and it also does an automatic stocktake every six weeks”.

“Thank you”. Rachanda looked around at the miraculously tidy medbay and then at the blaze of energy standing in front of her. My word, he was - extremely striking. A handsome young man paired with the handsome slightly older doctor. A very attractive couple. Suddenly, she missed her husband, Beau, with a pain that was almost physical. She would call him as soon as she could. “It certainly looks much better, and thank you for the programme, that will be very helpful”.

“No problem”, Jim said, waving his hand dismissively. “If I can do anything else, just let me know. I’m in the married quarters”. He looked across at Bones. “How’s he doing?”

“He’s going to be okay, Jim”, said Rachanda. “He’s tired and run down, but he’ll be okay. Just let him rest, and call me if you need anything”.

“I will, thank you”. Jim went to Bones and stroked his face. “Hey, you”, he whispered. “You ready to come with me?”

Bones’ eyes flickered. “Always”, he whispered, and Jim smiled down at him.

“Right answer”, he said. “You want me to wheel you there?”

“Oh Lord, no. I walked in, I can walk out”.

“Sure you can. Come on then, big man”. He helped Bones sit up and then held him gently as he closed his eyes, clearly dizzy. Rachanda stepped forward, but Jim glared at her and she stopped. These two were clearly extremely self-sufficient. 

Bones slipped off the biobed and Jim was by his side, pulling Bones’ arm around his shoulders and getting a grip around his waist. “Ready?” he said and Bones nodded.

“I’ll come by and see you tomorrow”, Rachanda said, and Jim nodded as they slowly made their way out of the medbay.

Luckily the corridors were empty and they got back to their quarters unseen. Jim basically dumped Bones on the couch and looked at the bed thoughtfully before dismissing it out of hand. He bent down to Bones and kissed his cheek. “I’ll be gone just a minute or two, love. I’ll be back really soon”. And then he was gone, the door hissing closed behind him.

Bones sat and stared at the wall. His chest was loosening now as the hypo took effect, so that was something, but he was just - exhausted. It was as if everything had hit him all at once, and he just wanted to lie down. He thought about the bed but it was a long way away and it was an unappealing thought anyway, and so he simply sat there.

Jim came bustling back into their room, his arms full of blankets and pillows.

“Found the quartermaster”, he said. “Charmed him. May have inadvertently offered him all kinds of sexual favours, but we’ll cross that bridge later. Hang on in there, my Bones”. He threw the bedding on the floor and half ran into the bedroom, coming back with the pillows and blankets from the two beds. He used all the bedding to make a nest on the floor big enough for them both, and then approached Bones.

“Come on, love”, he said, can you stand up for me? Need to get you undressed and into bed”.

Bones shook his head. Standing was out of the question right now. “Can’t”, he said, “Legs have stopped working”.

“So has your brain by the sound of it”. Bones could hear the worry beneath the snippiness and wanted to reassure him, but maybe he could do that later.

Jim, with a gentleness that was in direct contrast to his tone, pulled Bones’ tunic over his head and then bent down to work on his boots. The trousers caused a bit more of an issue, as no amount of pleading could make Bones raise his hips. In the end Jim bent down and bit into one of the seams and very simply pulled them apart. He would face the shit later.

“Okay, come on”, he said, “just slide on down here”.

Bones settled into the nest with a sigh of relief. It was incredibly comfortable, and when Jim, efficiently and quickly stripped, settled next to him and pulled the blankets over them, it was about as warm and cosy as Bones had ever been.

“Now, let’s get some rest”, Jim whispered, gathering Bones close to him. 

“But it’s too early…”

“And we don’t have anywhere to be right now”, Jim said. “Don’t worry your currently empty head. Sleep, love. Just get some sleep”.

So Bones did. He turned his head so that he could rest it against Jim’s and then he let go and fell off the cliff. No dreams, no disturbance, no nothing. He didn’t even stir when Jim got up, unable to lie in bed any longer. He slept for eighteen hours straight.

“Hey”. Jim saw Bones begin to stir. “Hey, love”.

Bones’ eyes flickered open and he frowned, obviously trying to work out where he was.

“ _Sun Tzu_ ” Jim said quickly. “Remember? You got sick”.

Bones nodded. “So tired”, he said. “How long have I slept?”

“About eighteen hours”, Jim said, kneeling next to Bones and brushing his hair away from his face. “How do you think you’re doing?”

Bones closed his eyes. “Still so tired”, he said.

“You look done in”, Jim said. “Can you sit up for a while? You need to eat and drink. Then you can rest again”.

In the end they worked out a system where Jim sat with his back against the wall, and Bones sat between Jim’s legs, leaning against his chest. He needed the warmth around him, needed Jim’s energy. In that position, he could force some hot soup down and drink a mug of what Jim claimed was hot chocolate but Bones doubted. The fuel made him feel better though, and they sat in that position for an hour or so, not talking much, Jim’s fingers constantly brushing through Bones’ hair, the movement comforting them both.

“Sorry”, Bones said at one point. “Sorry I got sick”.

“Hey, don’t be a dumbass”, Jim said softly. “Let me look after you for once. You look after me all the time, so let me do this”. He kissed Bones’ hair. “I could find a new calling as a medic”.

“You’d only catch everything”, Bones said. He remembered that he had to jab him against the flu… but not yet. He had to tell Rachanda about Jim’s health issues, had to give her the list of allergies… everything he should have been doing whilst he was sleeping.

“Stop worrying about me”, Jim said with that weird insight he occasionally had. “I’m not a baby. Let’s get you fixed up”.

“I just need to sleep”, Bones said. “Just need to rest”. He closed his eyes and let his head loll back against Jim, who eased him back down into the ‘bed’.

“You sleep then”, he said quietly. “I have to work today, is that okay? Can you hear me? Listen to me, Bones. If you need me, I’ll be in engineering, okay? You just call me if you need me”. He put Bones’ comm by his right hand. “The comm is just there, okay?” 

Bones nodded and tilted his head. Jim kissed him and then wrapped him up in the blankets again and watched as he fell quickly asleep. He backed out of their quarters, hating having to leave him.

Jim was frankly terrified. He was so, so frightened that Bones was really sick, was going to be sick for a long time. He couldn’t do without his Bones by his side, at his back, within reach all the time. He just couldn’t. He had gone feral when he thought Bones had left him during the _Nerada_ disaster; there was always the knowledge that if he were left along then he would leave by the nearest airlock. He was a strong person, he knew that; he had lived through years of abuse and heartbreak, but he had given his heart, fuck he had given his soul and now he was weak where Bones was concerned.

“I’ll come by”, Rachanda promised as Jim put his head round the medbay door. “Has he eaten?”

“Yeah”, Jim said. “I left him asleep again”.

“That’s fine”. Rachanda was warming to Jim. She had managed to sneak a look behind the camouflage and seen the frightened boy crouching in the corner. She wasn’t having that. She was going to ensure Bones made as speedy a recovery as possible.

“I have to work”, Jim said. “I’ve left the comms by him, told him to call me if he needs me, but I have to work”.

“Go, he’ll probably sleep most of the day anyway”. She smiled. “He just needs rest, nothing more”.

“Okay”. Jim trusted her. She reminded him of Annie, even though the two women were totally different. They both had that same inner strength. “I have to go”.

“You keep saying that, so go”. She waved a hand at him and he grinned half-heartedly and left, heading for the engine room.

Much to his own surprise, Jim lost himself in the work. It was all pretty much grunt work, but the physical nature of it was what he needed, giving him a chance to work off the pent up nervous energy that was fizzing through him. He was on his own most of the time, but luckily too busy to really think, and the only other person he saw was Sasha, who made him laugh with her comments about the Chief, Modesta. The crew on this ship really didn’t like their seniors, no doubt about that.

He got back to the cabin later than he intended, having stopped for a quick bite to eat in the cafeteria. When he opened the cabin door, the lighting was dim but not low and Bones was out of the nest, sitting on the couch with a blanket wrapped around him. He looked up as Jim came in, and smiled, his face still pale.

“Hey!” Jim activated the lock on the door and made his way over to the couch, sitting next to Bones. “How are you doing, big man?”

“I’m doing okay”, Bones said. “Been up for a couple of hours, and am going to make it another couple of hours before I give in and go back to bed”. He smiled. “You come with me that time, yeah? Don’t like being in bed by myself”.

“You’re no fun when you’re asleep”. Jim leaned into him and hugged him, face buried in Bones’ neck. “Christ, welcome back, love”. Bones opened the blanket and wrapped it around them both as much as he could, and they sat quietly for a moment before, with a laugh, Jim said, “You really need a shower. You smell terrible”. He looked up, still smiling and kissed Bones’ cheek. “And a shave as well. I like my man rugged, but not like this”.

Bones nodded. “I know. I’m disgusting. I’ve been trying to make my legs work so I can get to the shower”.

“Oh, well I’m here now, so that’s easy”. Jim pushed himself up. “I need to get clean blankets as well, these are all sweaty and gross”. He paused. “Shall I do that first? Let me get more bedding and then we’ll have a shower and you can eat something”.

“What about you?”

“Nah, I’ve eaten. Tell you what, I’ll get you some soup now and you can eat it whilst I get the bedding, then the shower, then bed. Yeah?”

“Plan”. Bones wrapped the blanket around himself. “I could get used to this”.

“Well, don’t”, Jim said, kissing his cheek again. “Want my man back”.

With another quick grin, he picked up the bedding from the floor and disappeared out of the door, ready to charm the quartermaster with what could have been more sexual favours (he didn’t speak the language very well, and the word for ‘bedding’ and the word for ‘loving’ were horribly close together).

By the time he got back to the cabin, he remembered that he had forgotten to make the soup, and he kicked himself mentally. He really was shit. Bones was still reclining on the couch, eyes closed, but he opened them as soon as Jim entered and smiled, and there was a little of the old devilment in that smile that twisted Jim’s gut. “Hey”, he said. “More blankets, more blow jobs promised. I’m gonna be busy in the next few days”.

“Well, keeps you in practice”, Bones said, and Jim laughed as he quickly made a new nest and then straightened up. “Come on scuzzy, into the shower. You can eat after that”.

“Masterful”. Bones let the blanket slip and held out a hand. “Help me up”.

They got into the bathroom and managed to both fit into the shower stall (“this is for married couples? Jesus, you could accidentally impregnate someone in here”), then Bones sat on the lowered toilet seat, Jim knelt in front of him, and slowly and carefully shaved him. Even in Bones’ exhausted state, and Jim’s over-hyped and worried mindset, it was incredibly erotic, and there was rather a lot of meaningful eye contact.

“Save that thought for later”, Jim said finally, standing up and helping Bones to his feet. “Because we’ll be doing that again as soon as you’re functional”.

“We absolutely are”.

They slept tangled together that night; Jim was worn out after a day of heavy physical work, Bones was still just worn out, but the sleep for both of them was more healthy and far more healing. By the morning when they woke, Bones was turning the corner back to normality and Jim, although aching, was feeling, as he put it, “outstandingly manly”.

__

That set the pattern for the next two days. Jim continued to work in the engine room and slowly began to make friends and contacts within the crew, who soon realised that he was far from being an ‘ordinary’ cadet, and Bones found his way back to normality. He actually came out of it feeling better than he had in a long time. He hadn’t realised just how exhausted he was.

So the night that Jim came home, food in hand for them both,and Bones was dressed, the ‘bed’ was put away and he was just standing there looking beautiful and perfect and well, was one of the best days of Jim’s recent past. He didn’t quite drop the food he was carrying, but it was a close thing. He put it on the floor by the door and then simply walked up to Bones and let those familiar arms wrap around him.

“You’re getting new muscles, kid”, Bones said, feeling the strength in him. “It must be all that physical work”.

Jim didn’t respond, simply stood there, arms around Bones’ waist, and Bones quickly realised that Jim didn’t have any words right then; he was just too relieved.

“Ah, kid”, he said. “I’m not going to leave you. You have to stop worrying every time I get sick. I know that everybody leaves you, I get that, but I’m not everybody; I’m me. I’m not going anywhere without you”.

“I know, I know”, Jim said quietly. “I get that I’m stupid, but I can’t help it”.

“And the one thing you’re not is stupid”, Bones said quickly. “You’re just - you. But I’m back now, and I’m hungry, and I’m suffering from cabin fever”.

“I brought food”. Jim pulled away and pointed at the food on the floor.

“Nah, I need to get out for a while. Let’s go to the cafeteria”.

“You sure? You’re not just feeling okay here and then you’re going to fold halfway down the corridor?”

“If I start to fold, you’ll be there to catch me. Come on, take me to dinner, you romantic fool”.

It was the first time they had been seen together, Jim realised, as they entered the cafeteria. More than a few heads swivelled, and more than a few whispers started up. Bones raised his head and fixed them with his patented glare, and the whispering soon stopped.

“God, you’re good”, came a voice from close by and Bones turned to see the engineer - Sasha? - that Jim had been speaking to on their first day.

“You have no idea”, said Jim fervently. “That was only a dismissive glance. If he really gives the glare, you turn to stone”. He stopped by her table. “Bones, this is Sasha. She’s one of the engineers and has been showing me the ropes. Sasha, Doctor Leonard McCoy”.

“Good to meet you”, said Sasha, shaking Bones’ hand. “Jim talks about you a lot but I was beginning to think you were a figment of his imagination. Would you like to join me?”

“Good to meet you, Sasha, and thank you for showing him around. Could we join you another day? I’ve been a little bit off-colour, and would like to spend some time with Jim when I’m actually awake”.

Sasha fell for the southern charm immediately. She just missed a simper as she nodded and Jim could see the dawning embarrassment in her eyes as she realised. He grinned at her, the full sunshine grin, and she blinked, even more confused. She sat down, feeling somewhat as if she had just been zapped by some kind of super power. She had certainly never seen Jim so ablaze; in fact she had thought he was a quiet man, somewhat withdrawn. She would have to re-evaluate. She gave the couple another glance and then looked around for her friend Mari. Not given to gossip, there were some things that had to be talked about. This was one of them. 

__

That night they lay in a freshly made nest and talked. Talked about what the next few months held for them, what the future held for them.

“I feel like I’m in limbo”, Jim said at one point. “I’m technically still a cadet, but I’ve basically been pulled out of school. What happens when I get back? Do I have to go back before I go forward?”

“I think this will count towards credits”, Bones said. “I know that I’m now counted as having graduated, so I kind of expect this will count as your graduation. We’re not normal, you and me, we can’t even graduate properly!”

“Ah, we’re normal”, said Jim airily. “It’s everyone else who’s strange”.

After that, there wasn’t so much talking, just a lot of touching and kissing, Jim clinging to Bones, wishing he knew how to keep him safe, realising yet again just how vital he was.

“I can’t do it without you”, he said, hands tangled deep in Bones’ hair as he held him still. “You promise me that you won’t leave me. You take me with you”.

“We’ll go together in about eighty years”, Bones said. “We won’t leave each other behind”. He shook his head. “Jesus, listen to me. I’m like some kid in the first flush”. He looked deep into Jim’s eyes. “I have never felt this. Does it ever fade, do you think? Does it ever just - settle? It’s so fucking intense it scares me sometimes”.

“I hope it doesn’t”, Jim said seriously. “I don’t want to ever just be normal, that’s boring. I want to always be like this, even when we’re old and grey and in our wheelchairs”. 

“Deal”. Bones smiled, that eye-softening smile that always made Jim’s insides melt just a little bit. “But doesn’t it scare you just a bit?”

“There’s too much real scary shit out there”. Jim shook his head. “What’s in here? That’s not scary. That’s fucking - grand”.

“Grand?” Bones shook his head. “You’re a complete nutcase sometimes. Now come here, shut up and sleep”. He pulled Jim close and wrapped them in the blankets, cocooning them in warmth and security. Jim’s eyes flickered closed in sheer contentment. 

“They have no idea”, he murmured, fidgeting into a more comfortable position. “Omega. They have no idea what’s going to hit them”.

Bones response was nothing more than a breath and Jim, with a fond smile, closed his own eyes and let sleep take him.

_Part Two - Omega Station_

Jim had not been far off in his initial thought. Omega was so far out in the boonies that it had been more or less forgotten about as far as the inhabitants were concerned and had taken on the air of a frontier town.

“I feel”, Jim commented to no-one in particular, “that I should be walking down the centre of the street with my gun strapped to my side. Possibly looking for my horse”.

“Can you actually ride a horse?” Bones asked mildly, checking around the cabin to make sure that they hadn’t left anything behind.

“I could if I wanted to”, Jim prevaricated, which told Bones everything he wanted to know and he stored the information away for ammunition sometime in the future. It would involve horses. And it would involve a long, long ride. Bones was a born rider and he suspected that Jim would be better classed as ‘enthusiastic’ which could make for a lot of amusement. Small pleasures.

“Come on”, he said. “Let’s get off this ship”.

“Won’t be sorry”. Neither of them had particularly enjoyed their journey although they had made some good friends. It had been hard to be part and yet not part of the crew, and Jim in particular had suffered with no place at all. He had ended up being an errand boy and had hated every second of it. He had kept the smile on his face, kept the charm in place, and been in the gym every night taking it out on the punch bag. As a result he had new muscles which Bones liked a whole lot, but he was also heading towards one of his major meltdowns, and they were never pretty. Jim needed to be off this ship as soon as possible.

The only positive about their lowly positions is that they were not expected to report to anybody and so they simply scanned themselves out and that was it, their time aboard done.

They checked in at the Starfleet hostel just beside the spaceport and settled down to wait until they were summoned for the onward journey to the homestead. They had orders but no real idea as to what they were supposed to be doing.

Jim had just finished bitching about the condition of the room they had been assigned when the door chime sounded, indicating a visitor. Looking at each other and shrugging, Bones went over to open it.

Standing in the corridor was a tall, immaculately dressed Vulcan who looked so out of place in the scruffy hostel facing two tired, travel-stained men, that for a second Bones thought he was hallucinating and he blinked stupidly for a second.

“Dr McCoy, I presume?” The Vulcan looked over Bones’ shoulder into the room. “And Mr Kirk?” He nodded to himself when neither man answered. “I am T’kal, commander of this base. I received notification from Admiral Pike that you were arriving on the _Sun Tzu_. I am here to welcome you to Omega”.

“Oh, well thank you, sir”, Bones finally got all his senses pointing in the same direction. “Forgive us, we weren’t expecting a visit from you”.

“Admiral Pike asked me to check on you and make sure no harm had come to you during your long journey. He has mentioned that you have not been contacting him as frequently as he would have expected”.

“We’ve been fine, sir”, Jim chimed in and T’kal looked at him, nodding politely, pretending that he didn’t know Jim was only a cadet and really had no right to be speaking to him.

“Very good. I will inform Admiral Pike”. T’kal nodded. “Gentlemen, once more welcome to Omega. The transport to the homestead will be here at 0700 tomorrow and you will be fully briefed then”. With a final nod he walked away, back ramrod straight.

“Is it a thing with Vulcans?” Jim whispered. “Ramrods up the ass?”

Bones stepped back and deliberately stood on his foot. “Don’t be an ass”, he said crossly. He’d had his fill of everything. He was tired, hungry, dirty and generally ticked off. He felt patronised by T’kal’s visit and he didn’t need Jim being a dick.

Jim, as ever sensitive to Bones, stepped back to give him some space. “Okay”, he said. “You doing okay?”

“Yeah”. Bones sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “This is going to sound bad, and I’m sorry for it, but I feel as if we’re both being treated as if we’re cadets”.

“Er, we are”. Jim quirked a smile. Bones saw the brief flash of hurt and, annoyed at himself, shook his head. 

“Go on, what do you mean?” Jim crossed his arms. 

“I knew this was going to sound bad. I mean, I’m older than you, I have a career already. I’m not - I’m not like you”.

“Oh”. Jim nodded. “Thanks for that. And by the way, nobody’s like me”.

“True”. Bones sighed again. “I’m sorry, love. I didn’t mean… I’m tired”.

Jim had never once been able to hold a grudge against Bones and he wasn’t about to start now, not when they were about a zillion miles away from anybody else they knew. And anyway it was Bones.

So, “I know”, he said. “Come on man, get a shower, I’ll work out where the food is and then we can get some sleep. We have to be up at stupid o’clock tomorrow to get that transport to fuck knows where”.

Bones stepped forward, up into Jim’s space. “It’s never you”, he said, knowing that Jim always needed that validation, even though deep down he knew everything anyway. “You know that, right? It’s never you”. He put his hands on Jim’s shoulders and then slid them up into his hair, tugging gently. “You piss me off on so many levels, but by Christ, I would die without you”.

“I know”. Jim smiled, but only with his eyes. The most sincere smile he had in his vast arsenal of smiles. “I live to piss you off. But I’m not a kid you know, just because you’ve had experiences I never have. If T’kal wants to think like that then fine, let him. But don’t you ever, ever make that mistake. You only ever did once, remember?”

“I remember”. Bones nodded. He pulled Jim into a bear hug. “Just tired and feeling a bit sorry for myself”.

“Yeah, same”. Jim hugged him back. “Come on. Shower”.

“Don’t make me shower alone in a strange place”. Bones smiled and Jim laughed, and it was okay again. It always was. It was why they were unbeatable.

__

Jim woke deep in the night from a dream of hunger and pain and children screaming. Screaming and screaming. Such pain and such fear and such helplessness. His whole body jerked and one hand reached out to push something away. A sound must have caught in his throat because Bones was awake in an instant, wrapped around him and holding him safe in his arms, speaking quietly and softly, words of nonsense and sometimes just meaningless sounds.

“Fuck, oh fuck Bones, not again…” Jim found he was panting, struggling to breathe. He could _taste_ the loss and the fear. He could taste Tarsus. Flames and famine and the stench of rotting flesh. The absolute horror of everything. It had been years since this had last happened to him. Not since Pike had peeled him off the floor of the dive and pointed him towards space had this happened. Bones had never - Bones didn’t know what was happening. Bones was just responding because the man he loved was in trouble. He had Bones; Bones would never hurt him. Bones loved him and would never leave…

“Don’t leave me”, he gasped without realising he was going to speak. “Please don’t leave me”.

“Never”. Bones pulled him in more tightly. “Jim, my Jim, come on, tell me”. He stroked a strong hand through Jim’s hair. “It’s okay, I’m here and I’ll never leave you”. His lips were brushing Jim’s ear and he seemed to be touching Jim everywhere, there was no part of him that didn’t belong to Bones. Bones was always there, always would be. He wasn’t like the others.

Jim closed his eyes and forced himself to breathe slowly. “Okay”, he said finally. “I’m okay”. He pressed back into Bones. “Just a really, really bad dream”.

“Want to tell me about it?”

Jim began to shake his head and then stopped. This was Bones. He mustn’t ever lie to Bones, never hide anything.

“Tarsus”. The word tasted like sawdust. “I dreamed about Tarsus”. He sighed. “I haven’t dreamed about it for so long”.

“It’s over, you’re never going back there”. Bones’ voice was a rumble in his ear, comforting and supportive, and sounding like home and security.

“I know, I know”. He sighed and turned over until he was nose to nose with Bones. “Fuck. Just … fuck”. He finished on a sigh. “I thought it was behind me. Surely if I was going to have a bad dream it would be about all that shit that happened when I freaked”.

“You were so young when Tarsus happened, it’s in your soul”. Bones pushed the sweaty hair out of Jim’s eyes. “I love that bit of hair that always flops like that”, he said inconsequentially. “You coped with everything Tarsus could throw at you and you locked it away. Sometimes it comes out. But I don’t know why now. What’s scared you?” He brushed at Jim’s hair again and then dragged him even closer. “You’re feeling vulnerable about something, but I don’t know what”. Jim could hear the frown and he nuzzled into Bones’ throat, the dream moving away now 

“Don’t”, he said. “I know you want to protect me all the time, but you weren’t there, my Bones. If you had been, you would have looked after us all, I know that. We would have been a great team”. He kissed Bones’ throat. “I’m good. Probably just - everything, you know. I’m still not good at shit happening. Or at least shit happening to you”. He snorted. “God, you know this is the only time I’ve ever let anybody get past all the barriers … it makes you so vulnerable, doesn’t it? Thinking about somebody else instead of yourself”.

“You haven’t ever thought about yourself”, Bones corrected. “You thought about the kids and once that was over, you stopped thinking about anything because all you wanted was oblivion. But if I’ve made you feel again - well, fuck it kid, I’m pleased about that. Maybe even proud”.

“Yeah”. Jim kissed his throat again. “Yeah”. He closed his eyes. “It’s gone now. I don’t know where it came from, but it’s gone again”.

__

And then the next day when Jim saw Homestead (he had started to think of it as that, had given it the capital letter) he realised what had brought the dream on. Homestead was Tarsus in microcosm. The smell hit him as he got off the piece of shit transporter, stiff and tired and no matter what he said to Bones, uneasy right down in his soul. He head ached after two days of sleeping on the road and things just felt - completely off. His legs felt wobbly, he couldn’t focus on what was being said to him and deep down in his belly he could feel a scream of panic starting, and he knew that if that sound escaped him, it would never stop. He would just scream and scream until he disappeared into the void.

“What’s wrong?” Bones of course had noticed. He had been standing by the tail end of the transporter shouting at a hapless ensign who had lost one of the packs of medication, but with that sixth sense he had where Jim was concerned he had realised something was wrong and had moved up immediately. “Talk to me”. Jim couldn’t answer. The smell of the place… Jesus, that smell.

“Jim?”

“The smell”, Jim finally managed to say. “It’s that smell. It smells like Tarsus. Are there dead people here?”

“There is some death”. This was Eduardo Vasquez, the other medic who was with them. He glanced curiously at Jim’s face. “There’s a lot of illness here. That’s why we’re all here, to help out. What’s wrong with your friend?” The last part was aimed at Bones, who ignored the question, focused as he was on Jim.

“There’s not some”, Jim said, looking at Bones. “There’s more than some. And it’s new”. He looked around them. “There’s something happening here”. He broke away and made for the front of the transporter where the comms officer was lounging against the fuselage chatting to the pilot. “Hey!” Jim marched up, straight into their space. “What’s going on here? Has there been an outbreak of some kind?”

The two men looked as if they wanted nothing more than to ignore this jumped-up nobody, but as Bones could have told them, if Jim wanted to be heard, then Jim would be heard. He did the thing that he always did when he was on edge and stepped right into Comms’ face. Even from where he stood, Bones could see the tension in both of them and he took a step forward, ready to intervene. But Jim was in the zone, and something was getting to him.

“I said have you heard something? What are we getting into?”

“Nothing, Cadet”. The captain intervened and the voice he used should have been enough to freeze anybody in their tracks. But of course, he didn’t know Jim. Jim raised his hand to brush him away as if he were an annoying gnat whilst keeping his gaze fixed on the comms officer. “Well?”

“Oh for… no, _Cadet_ , we haven’t heard anything, we’re not dumping you into something you’re not ready for. Now go back to your nursemaid and let us get on with our job”.

Bones got there just as Jim’s fist clenched, fixed Comms with a glare that nobody argued with - not even Jim - and steered him away. He didn’t say anything because the glare had said it all, and he saw Comms’ eyes shift slightly to one side. And that one shift, that one little flicker, made him realise that there was something. It was enough to make him turn back and get into Comms’ face in his turn. “What do you know?”

“I don’t know anything”, Comms said. “We haven’t heard anything for the entire journey”.

“And that would be because?” Bones saw the flicker again and it hit him. “Oh, because you haven’t had any communications at all, have you? Your comms are down”. For the third time, the flicker. This time Bones turned to the captain of the transporter, who was clearly thinking about edging away.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Bones demanded. “Do you intend on just dumping us here and leaving us to our fate? If there is death down there, then we need to organise help”.

“How do you know there’s death there?” the captain said defensively. “You taking the word of the schizo kid?” He nodded at Jim who still stood and fumed.

Bones erupted. “The ‘schizo kid’ is my husband. You are so fucking insulting that I can see why the only run you can get is this trip up and down the ass of the universe. You will tell me what the fuck is going on, or so help me I will smack your stupid heads together”. He held up a hand as the captain opened his mouth. “I’m fully fucking aware that technically I’m still a cadet; I’m also an experienced doctor, I have about a lifetime’s more experience than you, and more to the point I trust the ‘schizo kid’ with my life. So you fix those comms and you find out what’s happened”. He paused for breath. “And if you can’t fucking fix them, then I know someone who can”. He grabbed Jim’s hand. “Now, do you need his help? And where’s the fucking support here? Is this place really so abandoned that there’s nobody here to greet us?”

He pushed Jim towards the cockpit. “Fix the fucking comms, find out what’s happened and talk to Omega. I’m going down to Homestead to find out what’s happening”.

“Bones, no…”

“Bones, yes!” Jim blinked. “This is my job, Jim, this is what I’m here for”. He glanced over to the pile of gear that had been unpacked. “I’ll suit up don’t worry”. He looked back at the captain and the comms officer who were now looking at each other and clearly building up to a counter attack. After all, Bones was very close to committing mutiny. What the two men didn’t realise was that Bones didn’t care.

“You have three ensigns aboard, you have Cadet Kirk and you have Doctor Vasques and myself. And you two. The doctor and I will go down to Homestead; can I suggest that you perhaps - oh, do your job? As soon as Cadet Kirk gets those comms fixed - and he will, I guarantee - you contact Omega and you find out what they know”. He took a deep breath. “Jesus, you people have something to answer for”.

More than they realised, Bones knew that. Jim was heading for a major episode, that much was more than obvious. He had been running on fumes since the _Nerada_ and he was about to blow in the worst way. It just depended what form it took. But worried as he was, Bones had to clamp down on that concern; he had a job to do in Homestead first. Jim would have to wait. 

With a final glare in the direction of the officers, he made his way over to Vasquez and quickly explained what had happened and what was going to be done. Vasquez, although he had served longer and had more experience in space, showed no sign of arguing. But then, nobody argued with Bones when he was angry and on a mission. Well, only one person.

“No! You’re not going without me!” Jim straightened up from where he had been crouched over the wiring leading to the communications and wiped his hands on the seat of his pants. “I’m not having you do that, I’m not letting you out of my sight again!”

“Jim, listen to me”, Bones tried to interrupt but Jim was on a roll.

“You promised me that this wouldn’t happen again. I need to be there, I need to see what’s going on down there…”

“Jim!” The tone made Jim falter but not stop. “These comms are simple, I can fix them in five minutes. You just wait for me. You need me there…”

“Jim!” This time Bones actually put the full force of his personality behind his tone, and Jim stopped, breathing hard. Bones hated himself. Jim’s eyes were wide and wild and he was still rubbing his palms on the seat of his pants. He was, Bones saw, absolutely terrified and he was tempted to give in, because he wanted to keep an eye on Jim. But he absolutely would not expose him to whatever had happened in that village until he had seen for himself. The kid was a walking bundle of trauma and the last thing he needed was to be exposed unnecessarily to something that would trigger him into a meltdown. Bones doubted if they were going to get out of this without one of those happening anyway. The only thing was to wait and see how severe it was going to be.

“Listen”, he said, softening his voice, and taking a small step towards Jim. “Listen, you know that you have to stay here, you know you do. Just as you know that I have to go. Jim, love, it’s my job, it’s what I do. What would you think of me if I said that I wouldn’t bother going and just hared back to Omega to tell the grown ups? You’d be disgusted with me. And quite rightly”. He reached out and brushed that strand of hair back off Jim’s forehead. “Stay here until I’ve been down there. I won’t expose myself to danger and I’ll be back soon”.

“That’s what you said last time, and look what happened”. Jim knew he wasn’t going to win, but Bones could see that he didn’t want to back down.

“Exactly, that was last time. The chance of lightning striking twice is pretty unlikely, don’t you think?” He smiled and tilted Jim’s face upward. “Jim, don’t sulk, you’re not twelve years old”. He saw Jim’s lip twitch and pushed his luck.

“Fix this shit”. He pointed at the wiring. “Prove to those dicks outside that you’re better than they are, and between us we’ll show them how to do their job. I’m going for a look, no more. I’m taking Vasquez and we’ll be back”. He took a deep breath. “I’m not having you exposed to anything you can’t handle”. He held up a hand as Jim took a huge breath to argue. “Don’t”, he said. “You know I’m making sense. This isn’t the time to argue for the sake of arguing, okay?”

Jim sagged. “Yeah, you’re right”. He ran his hands over his face. “I’m being a fuckwit, I know that, but it’s just hard, you know?”

“I know, but come on, I don’t want you like this”.

Jim stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Bones. “Go get ‘em, tiger”, he said, kissing him hard. “Go fix people, I’ll fix this mess, and we’ll beat the world, same as we always do”.

“I worship the ground you walk on”, Bones murmured into his ear, “but by Christ you don’t make it easy, do you?”

“Wouldn’t be me if I did”. Jim kissed him again. “Go on, fuck off. See you back here real soon”. Bones laughed and turned away. “But Bones… If anything happens, I will track down whoever or whatever hurts you and crush them into the ground. Don’t make me responsible for that”.

__

Jim fixed the comms. He fixed it because he was a fucking boy genius and frankly it was a piece of piss. He could see the comms officer wanted to punch him so much he had to grit his teeth. It wasn’t often JIm came up against someone who disliked him so intensely for no reason. He usually liked to give them a reason before they really developed a proper loathing. But hey, whatever. It gave them something to do because they sure as fuck weren’t doing their jobs. So what with one thing and another, Jim had barely had time to work up a really good head of worry before Bones and Vasquez were back, and Jim’s world calmed down again.

“Well?” He knew better than to approach too closely. Bones was still in his hazmat gear and Jim would get himself royally smacked if he got too close. Metaphorically, at least.

“You were right”. Bones shook his head. “There’s some kind of virus that has taken hold just in the past 48 hours. If our comms had been working we would have been prepared”. He sighed. “It has all the symptoms of - well, of cholera, although that’s a bacteria”.

"Okay, tell me what I can do”. Jim nodded at Dr Vasquez, who had just joined them. “Go get disinfected and come and talk to me. To us - the other guys on this boat are okay, as long as you ignore the captain and the comms, which isn’t tough”. He shrugged. “Fairly sure they’ve got a drug issue going on which explains why they’re stuck on this dead-end run”.

“Really?” Bones looked around. “Where are they?”

“Captain’s cabin. Comms came so close to punching me that the captain actually dragged him away”.

“Well done”, Bones said automatically. “Good to know you haven’t lost your touch. I bet you’ll claim you didn’t do anything”.

“I didn’t!” Jim was offended, and even more so when Vasquez snorted a laugh. “What?”

“This is exactly what Dr McCoy said would happen”, Vasquez explained. “He - talks about you quite a lot”.

Jim winked at them both. “Lot of shit to talk about”.

Bones rolled his eyes and normality was restored.

__

That evening, after Bones and Vasquez had visited the captain and Comms in the captain’s cabin and confirmed that there was indeed an issue with drugs, they gathered, along with Jim and the remaining crew members, in the main body of the ship. It was a bit on the cosy side and Jim was crushed between the wall and Bones, which was fine by him. He had half a mind to offer to sit on Bones’ knee to make more room, but a look from Bones made him swallow the idea.

“So what do we do?” Evans, the eldest of the three Ensigns on board, proved himself to be a dab hand in the galley and had produced some kind of stew which smelled delicious. It turned Jim’s stomach but a glare from Bones made him eat obediently, and once he started he realised that actually some fuel was welcome. The other two Ensigns, an Omega native called B’kal and a female from the Andromeda system called Rickson, showed themselves to be practical and willing to help, and it became obvious that the two commanding officers had kept these crew members cowed into near silence, and now that they had been more or less banished to the cabin, the atmosphere seemed lighter. It felt as if something could be done now.

Bones had taken _de facto_ control of the ship and had had B’kal and Rickson take a full inventory of the medication they had. Jim had been set to take care of the electrical systems aboard the ship, Vasquez to look after the captain and Comms, and Evans had become the quartermaster. Jim had never been so proud.

“So, tomorrow, we go back to Homestead”, Bones said. “We fix this. We check and see if it is something as simple to fix as cholera. If it is, then we educate these people about clean water, about basic hygiene, and then we get in touch with Omega to arrange for a sterilisation plant to be brought out. Jim, you deal with that. It’s up to you to keep them apprised of what we’re doing. Are they sending out another transport?”

Jim nodded. “They’re bringing out a ship to take the captain and Comms back to Omega. They’re also sending out another commander to take charge, so we have a couple of days to get everything in place before it’s taken away from us”.

“Plenty of time”, Bones said. “They stay in the cabin; they’re effectively under house arrest. Rickson, stay with Dr Vasquez, make sure nothing happens. You two, you come with me to Homestead”. 

"So you want me to stay here on the comms?” Jim said dangerously. 

“Yes. Conversation for later”. Bones flashed Jim a look, and Jim nodded. This was a Bones he hardly recognised. This Bones was a born commander and was sensationally good at it, and Jim wasn’t going to wreck it by making smart comments.

“Right”. Bones shovelled the last of his food into his mouth and pushed his plate away. “We need to get some rest”. He looked around. “Thanks everybody, thanks for not arguing and for being ready to help these people”.

“Of course”, Evans said, clearly speaking for them all. “It’s good to finally be doing something”.

Bones nodded and the crew dispersed.

The sleeping arrangements aboard the transport were rudimentary to say the least. The cadets were housed in a dormitory, but Bones, as a medical officer, shared a cabin with Vasquez, who had tactfully absented himself who-knew-where so that Jim could be with Bones.

“Well, what a fucking weird day”. Bones collapsed onto his bunk and held out an arm. Jim raised an eyebrow at the gesture, but quietly obeyed, tucking himself in as tightly as he could - otherwise his ass hung over the edge of the cot in a way that made him feel - chilly. “Are you going to start on me?”

“No. I was thinking about it, but I get it. I’m going to stay here. You know that I want to come to Homestead and try and help, but I also get that you don’t want me there… No”, it was his turn to hold up a hand. “You know what’ll happen, and so do I. I’ll take one look and get it; I’ll catch everything that’s going and then you’ll stick me with so many hyposprays that I’ll just have a nervous breakdown. So I’ll stay here and take care of the comms. And possibly punch anybody who steps out of line”. He laughed, but there was no humour in it. “Because I’ll tell you now that I’m about as tightly wound as I can go without all my springs bursting. So to speak. Don’t snort. You know what I mean. I’m so fucking angry with - everything. How have we ended up in this situation?”

“Because it’s us, love”, Bones said, arm wrapped tightly around Jim’s shoulders. “When are things ever straightforward? We get exiled because you try and protect somebody; we end up with a drug addict for a captain, and our destination is riddled with Victorian maladies”. He shrugged. “It’s just - us”. He kissed Jim’s temple. “Don’t get mad, Jim. Rein it in and focus it. You fixed the comms in about thirty seconds, when it would have taken anyone else hours, if not days. You are born for this. You’ll be a great Chief Engineer”.

“But I’m going to be Captain”, Jim said, and Bones could hear the drag in his voice as sleep began to claim him. “You’ll be my CMO, and we’ll be fucking unstoppable. As long as I don’t have a meltdown and you don’t catch - rickets, or whatever”.

Bones turned onto his side and pulled Jim closer, one hand cupping his backside, making Jim hum his approval. “Hi”, he said, eyes still closed. “You wanna fool around?”

“Always”. Bones kissed his forehead, then his closed eyes. “But mainly I just want to sleep”.

“Good choice”. Jim nestled closer. “We’re such an old married couple, aren’t we? We have a nice early night and then we go to sleep. Can cocoa be far away?”

“Stop babbling”. Bones closed his eyes as well. “Love you, you weird, weird man”.

“Mmm”. Jim had gone, and Bones wasn’t too far behind.

__

The next morning, all was bustling efficiency. Bones and his team were gone just after sunrise, although Evans had made sure they had eaten a decent breakfast before they left. Jim spent the day listening out for reports from Homestead, which he then transmitted to Omega and on to Starfleet, and tinkering with the transporter, regressing to his grease monkey days and amazing himself by losing himself in the intricacies of the engines.

“I didn’t realise you were a mechanic”, said Rickson at one point as she brought Jim out a drink. It was only then Jim realised the day was hot and the sun was already past its zenith.

“I’m not, not really”, he said, taking the drink gratefully. “I played with engines when I was a kid and I’m just kind of good with them. We all have a natural talent”. He grinned, a voice in the back of his mind asking why he was incapable of having a conversation without being either suggestive or flirtatious. No wonder Bones rolled his eyes so much.

“Not all of us”, said Rickson seriously, clearly missing the tone completely. “Although I do like to cook when I can get hold of real ingredients”. She looked around. “I could grow so much in this earth”.

“Well speak to Bones when he gets back”, Jim said immediately. “That’s the kind of thing he wants to hear”.

“He kind of scares me”. Rickson leaned against the transporter, arms crossed over her chest. “You seem to understand him so well”.

“Well, I’m married to him, didn’t you know?”

Rickson stood up straight. “No, I didn’t know!”

_What have you been doing over the past few days?_ Jim wondered, although he didn’t say anything. He just smiled and nodded. “Yep, not too long, still in the just-married phase”.

“Really? If this is just married, I dread to think what you’ll be like in ten years. You argue so much!”

Jim blinked in surprise. “No, we don’t”, he said. “We bicker”, he corrected. “But we’ve always bickered. That’s us. Does it really sound like arguing?”

Rickson shrugged. “Does to me; but I don’t know anything about relationships. I have to wait until my parents choose a mate for me”.

“Oh, fuck off!” It was out before Jim could ask himself whether that was the most tactful thing to say. “Fuck’s sake, Rickson, you’re a member of Starfleet, you’re going to travel the stars and you’re going to be doing things and meeting races your parents couldn’t even imagine. And you’re going to wait for them to _permit_ you to have a mate?” He frowned at her. “I don’t get it”.

“It’s our culture”, she said simply. “I can’t go against it”.

Jim shook his head. “I’m all for culture and for respecting your folks and everything, but - what about you? What if you meet someone and you fall for them? And what if they don’t measure up?”

“We don’t all have liberal parents”, she said, and she sounded a little bit sad.

“Hey, you don’t even want to know about my childhood”, Jim said with a painful smile. “But I met Bones and …” He clapped his hands, the sudden retort sounding loud in the still air, and making Rickson jump. “And that”, he said. “I fell for him in about a nanosecond. And if I had had parents, and if they had told me that I couldn’t have him, I would have turned my back on them”. He paused and then said, more softly. “I hope you meet someone who rocks your world and you travel with them forever”.

Rickson smiled gently. “Is that what you’re going to do - you and your - what do you call him? Bones”.

“Oh yes”, Jim said, and Rickson blinked at the change in his tone. “I got lucky and I’m not dumb enough not to know that”. He shrugged. “I hope you get that lucky, whether it’s with whoever your parents choose for you, or with someone you find in your travels”. He leaned forward and winked outrageously. “True love exists”. He made it a joke to hide the seriousness of what he had just said.

Rickson laughed and with a wave of her hand walked away, and Jim looked after her for a long moment. Talk about low self-esteem. He may be the poster boy for damaged kids, but she ran him a close second. He hoped she would be happy. He looked up at the sky again and judged it was heading towards mid-afternoon - _you can take the farmkid out of Iowa…_ and hopefully Bones would be back soon. They had one more day before the team from Omega were due to arrive. In that time, being Bones, he could probably have built a hospital. All that efficiency was _quite_ the turn on. He deliberately disappeared into a vaguely filthy daydream which was his best way of keeping any concerns at bay. Bones would be back soon and it would be okay again.

But he wasn’t back until after nightfall, and Jim was hanging on by a thread. 

“I just wish my imagination wasn’t so active”, he said to Bones as they sat quietly after their evening meal. “I get visions of all kinds of horrors”.

“Understandable”. Bones’ hand was comfortably stroking the back of Jim’s neck, fingers digging in rhythmically. “You’re awful paranoid sometimes, but I get it, and I promise you it’ll fade. You’ll learn to believe that I’m always going to come back”. Jim snorted and pressed his face against Bones’ shoulder.

“How did it all go really?” he asked. “I know what you said to everybody in there, but how was it really?”

Bones was silent for a long minute. “Fucking awful”, he said finally. “They’re so poor, Jim. I didn’t think societies like that existed any more. They really have been totally forgotten about”. He sighed and let his head droop against Jim’s. “It’s a crime, and Starfleet is going to know about it”.

“Do you think they knew?” Jim asked. “About what they were sending us into?

“No way”, Bones said. “No way. I don’t believe that Starfleet would let this happen if they knew about it. I think this is down to Omega and your friend T’kal. I think there’s something seriously funky going on”.

“He’s holding on to supplies and medicines, do you think? But why?”

“Because they can be sold on. Half of the medical supplies could be sold on the streets. Simple fact is that wherever there are a large group of people you will always have problems, it’s just the way of it”. He sighed. “Look at Comms and the captain. They’re going to go through a nasty withdrawal when we get back to Omega. We’re keeping them on a subsistence dose now to stop them chewing their own arms off”.

“We’ve got another day at most”, Jim said, pulling away and getting to his feet. “Then it’ll all be out of our hands. Come to bed. You’ve got another early start”.

It was a beautiful clear night, and Jim was all for sleeping outside with just a fire lit for warmth. Bones had initially vetoed it, but he had caught sight of Vasquez’ face and changed his mind. He had told Vasquez to go ahead; he and Jim would bunk outside. Evans and the others overheard Bones’ remark and before anybody realised, there was a roaring fire built up and all of them other than Vasquez and Rickson who were on duty, were bundled around it in whatever bedding they could find. Bones rolled his eyes at Jim, who simply grinned at him and dived beneath their nest of blankets.

“Can’t get a minute to ourselves”, Bones grumped, grabbing a handful of Jim’s backside and hauling him closer. “This feels like we’re at a Boy Scout jamboree”. Jim smirked and rested his leg across Bones’ thighs.

“Don’t think they ever did this at Boy Scout jamborees. If they had, I would have joined”.

“I can just see you in the shorts. You’d have all the badges, wouldn’t you?”

“Of course”, Jim said immediately. “And I would have come by at least half of them without cheating”.

Bones laughed and buried the sound in Jim’s hair. “Madman”, he muttered. He let his fingers wander possessively over Jim’s body and Jim grunted his approval. “I could do you right now”.

“Not in front of the children”, said Bones. “But same here”. He caught Jim’s mouth in a deep kiss, full of darkness and promise, and Jim whimpered softly.

“God”, he said when he could speak again. “Soon, just tell me it’ll be soon”.

“It’ll be soon”, Bones echoed, tucking Jim into his accustomed position. “Sleep, love”.

__

Jim woke first the next morning just before sunrise. The sky had that pearlescent shimmer to it that presaged another hot day, but right at that moment it was chilly. The fire was out and they were alone. Jim buried his head further beneath the blankets and pressed his cold nose against Bones’ chest. He was rewarded with a noise that could almost be described as a squeak, and it made him smile.

“Hi”, he whispered. “How you doing?”

“Was fine until about a second ago”. Bones’ voice was hoarse with sleep, but one hand automatically moved to Jim’s hair and tugged gently. “It’s cold out here”.

“I would offer to warm you up, but it’s maybe a bit too public for you”.

“Little bit”, Bones agreed. “Save it for when we’re somewhere with actual foundations”.

“What’s going to happen, do you think? When the support arrives from Omega?”

“Nothing much”. Bones shifted, his back suddenly twinging in protest at the hard ground. “I think we’ll fix what’s wrong - and we will fix it - and then there’s no reason why we can’t stay here, same as we’re supposed to. But I do need to report back to Starfleet direct, not to Omega. I want you to fix that up for me today, before they arrive, okay? If you can make it possible for me to speak to Pike, that would be fantastic”.

“No problem”. Jim poked his head out from their nest. “Don’t you love the smell of the dawn air? I love it. It’s like all the promise the day holds, before it all goes tits up”. He huffed, almost a laugh. “I saw so many dawns from the other side, nights when I hadn’t slept. Never saw how beautiful they were”. He paused, working out what he was going to say. “I love this”, he said finally. “I love this - being out here with you, feeling as if we’re doing something worthwhile”.

“That’s ‘cos you were born to do it, kid. You’ll understand one day that you were born to help people. You’ve always been on the side of the underdog, that’s why you’ve been beaten to a pulp so often…”

“I object to the ‘so often’”.

“Truth hurts”. Bones shivered in the cool air and pulled the blankets around them.

“We’re going to be a world beating team”, he said. “You do understand that don’t you?”

“We already are”, Jim smiled. “Proper fucking world beaters”. He kissed Bones’ shoulders. “But we’re world beaters who really need to get our asses out of this pit and get on with the day”.

With a groan, Bones pushed himself into a sitting position, grabbing one of the blankets on his way so that he could wrap it around his shoulders. Jim decided to be a tough country boy and sat up, but he couldn’t still the shiver. “Jesus it’s colder than I thought,” he said. “My nipples could cut glass”.

For some reason Bones found that comment utterly hilarious and began to laugh. Jim thought about getting offended but then decided not to. He simply grinned and stood up. “Come on, old man”. He reached out a hand and pulled Bones to his feet. “Let’s go get cleaned up, then I’ll put the call into Starfleet. Am I spending another day hanging around here instead of doing something useful?”

“What I’m asking you to do is useful”, Bones said. “You can work the communications. You can make the engines work above their capacity. Nobody else here can do that. I don’t want you in that village, not yet. Stop thinking it’s because I consider you’re too weak to take it. It’s because you genuinely can be more help here. I wish you’d understand that what goes on in your head isn’t weakness; it’s reaction. We’ll get past it, but now’s not the time to deal with it. Do you get me?”

“I do, I get you”. Jim put his hand on Bones’ cheek. “This is me not agreeing with you because I’m a manly man of action, not because I think you think I’m a fruitcake”.

“Oh, well that’s - good”. Bones blinked and then rolled his eyes. “God, you’re hard work”.

“That’s going to become the theme of our life”, Jim declared, his eyes beginning to smile. “Those will be your last words to me, in about a zillion years when we go out that airlock, you’ll turn to me and you’ll say, ‘Jesus Jim you’re hard work’”.

Bones believed him.

__

Jim felt better about Bones leaving that day. He was right; anyone could do the manual work, and he would happily do that as soon as he was relieved of the communications duty, but nobody else could do what he was being asked to do. It was boring but weirdly exhausting as well, waiting around for something to happen. He managed to put the call through to Starfleet and Bones was able to speak directly to Pike just before he had to set out for the village. Pike was silent for a long, long minute and then simply said, “Trouble just follows you two, doesn’t it?”

“Seems that way”, Bones agreed.

“Very well, thank you for the report”, Pike had said. “We’ll be on our way out there within the next day or two to have a little chat with Admiral T’kal. Bear in mind that it’s going to be a month before we get there”.

“Yes, sir”. Bones paused for a moment. “We can still do our job in the village and avoid any contact with Omega. We’ll wait here for you”.

“Good. Good work, both of you. Pike out”.

And so now they just had to wait. First for the party from Omega and then for the Starfleet representatives. The approach to the Omega party was going to take some thinking about. They had communicated to say that they would be there late that evening. Hopefully Bones would be back by then, but if not then they would just have to manage with Jim.

Rickson appeared again during the day to lean against the nearest available wall and talk. “I watched you last night when you were out by the fire”, she said. “You look happy. In your own world”.

“We are, I guess”, Jim agreed. He was stripped to the waist in the heat and standing with head in the engine compartment, having decided to try and improve the warp drive. It was shit anyway; he couldn’t do too much damage to it, and it passed the day. 

“Must be nice”.

“It is. Most of the time, but sometimes it comes across as a little weird”. He sliced his finger on a sharp corner and swore, putting his finger in his mouth and ducking out of the engine housing. “You been thinking about what we said last night?”

“Some, maybe”, she agreed. “The thing is, space is - well it’s so huge that I like to think there’s somebody out there who would see me. And we could choose each other”.

“Let me tell you something”. Jim inspected his finger and licked it again. “I never got to choose. I fell so hard the second I saw him that it felt preordained. Choice wasn’t there. It was inevitable. Same for him, if you ask him. If there’s such a thing as soulmates, well, we’re the epitome”. He put his finger back in his mouth. “It’s incredible, and I really hope you get to feel that”.

“Do you want some treatment for that finger of yours?” Rickson looked amused, and he shook his head. “Nah, it’ll stop soon enough”.

Rickson didn’t move, but she did look at the ground, and Jim looked at her.

“How does it feel?” she said finally and Jim reeled internally. Oh Christ, no! Surely he wasn’t going to have to have _the_ conversation with her? Oh nonono…

“What?” he squeaked.

“What you have with him?” Rickson swallowed nervously. “I don’t want to not recognise it”.

“Oh, you’ll recognise it”, Jim said, relieved. “because it lands on you and doesn’t let up. I think Bones and I are a bit - extreme. I don’t think everybody is quite so reliant on each other as we are. We border on the unhealthy, I sometimes think”. He shrugged, wiping his hand on his pants leg. “But that’s us. Everyone is different”.

She smiled and pushed herself away. “You need to clean that wound properly. If it gets infected I expect that will cause Dr McCoy to get very angry with you”.

“Just for a change”, Jim agreed and went back to his engine housing.

__

He was still messing about when the next voice intruded.

“Fine looking ass”. 

He dropped out of the housing and grinned at Bones, registering that he was already out of the suit and cleaned up. “Hey, gorgeous”. He leaned forward for a kiss. “Whatcha doing back so early?”

“Thought we should get a plan together for when our guests turn up”. He stretched. “We’ve done as much as we can without more supplies”.

“You look tired”, Jim said. “Don’t go making yourself sick again”. He linked his arm through Bones. “Let’s go have a swim. I’m sweaty as fuck”.

“You old charmer”, Bones said. “But yeah, that sounds like a damn fine idea. I am bushed”.

Pausing only to pick up a few supplies and tell Evans where they were going, they made their way down towards the river that ran behind the camp, Bones taking hold of Jim’s hand and raising it for a kiss. “What a start to our exile”.

“You said it. I didn’t know what to expect from this place, but I didn’t expect to hit the ground running like this”.

“We need to hand it off to someone with more experience”, Bones said. “We’re not here to lead, we’re here because - well, because you punched somebody. We’re here to help”. He sighed. “I’ll be glad to hand it over you know. I’m too tired for this. I feel like the tank is empty”.

Jim glanced at him anxiously. Bones never admitted to any weakness, but he did look grey and drawn.

“You’re not sick are you?” he asked anxiously.

“No, not at all”, Bones assured him hastily. “I’m just tired”.

“Okay, if you say so”. Jim glared worriedly. “Don’t get sick, my Bones. I need you. Well, always need you”. He looked at his feet as he said it. “Just right now I really need you”.

“And you got me”. Bones squeezed his hand. “Just tired, love. I want a proper bed. One that we can both fit in without wrecking our backs. And not the hard ground. Think it’ll be the ground again tonight, but tomorrow, who knows?” He laughed. “I’m going to fantasise about a fantastically soft bed. Or even just a bed”.

“I just want us to be on our own”, Jim said, slightly grumpily. “Don’t want to spend the next month with people all the time”. As ever, the grump didn’t last long, and he smiled the sunshine grin. “Want some alone time with my man”.

“Fool”. Bones pulled his hand free just so that he could wrap his arm around Jim’s shoulders and pull him close. “Let’s see whether the river can offer us anywhere nice and secluded for a bit of - alone time”.

It did.

__

They returned a couple of hours later, relaxed and sated, smiling like fools, straight into a scene of organised chaos. The transport from Omega had arrived and temporary sleeping quarters had been erected, there were enough boxes of medical equipment to make Bones drool, and enough people buzzing around to make Jim uneasy. He saw Evans standing close to a secure vehicle, and releasing Bones’ hand he made his way over. Bones wandered off, caught in the tractor beam of the medical equipment.

“Hey”, Evans nodded. “Wondered where you two had got to”.

“I was indulging in carnal knowledge of my husband”, said Jim blithely, smirking at Evans’ reaction. “What’s going on here?” He nodded towards the secure vehicle. “Who have you got in there?”

“The drug addicts”, said Evans, his lips turning down. “Man, they’re in a mess, heading towards withdrawal. No idea what they’re hooked on, but it’s got a messy downside”.

“Yeah, well that’s drugs for you”. Jim had never been tempted by drugs, working on the basis that he was enough of a mess without them, and didn’t really feel he could judge anyone else too strongly. “What’s going to happen to them?”

“They’re going back tonight”, Evans said. “I’m going with them. I seem to have become their bodyguard. Your doctor is staying to make his report, but I don’t know if they’re going to want him to stay after that. They’re really pulling rank, and I think we’re all going to be sent away to try and pretend this never happened”.

“Strikes me the easiest way to stop rumour spreading is to keep us here, but what do I know”. Jim scowled. “And he’s not ‘my doctor’, okay? That’s puerile”. He nodded. “Well if I don’t see you again, safe journey back”.

Except that he did see Evans again, because just like that, he and Bones were shunted to one side. No great surprise for Jim, but he was both incredulous and offended on Bones’ part. They seemed completely uninterested in what Bones had to say to them, and simply dismissed him. A senior medical officer had come out - Jim never did find out his name - and he seemed to consider that Bones had nothing of any importance to say. Bones, of course, was absolutely furious, but it didn’t do any good. At the end of it, as far as Starfleet was concerned, he was still a cadet, albeit one with a huge amount of medical experience, and he was outranked at every turn. If the powers that be wanted to ignore him, then they would ignore him. Eventually Jim dragged him away from the camp, physically pulling him away.

“I’ll go to Homestead myself!” Bones thundered at one point. “Who do those fucking - fucks - think they are?”

“They don’t know you”, Jim said. “They’re fools, they’re out here at the ass end of the universe for a reason; because they’re all complete and absolute dicks, and they think they know everything when they know nothing. But going to Homestead under your own steam is asking for trouble, and you know it is. You’ll end up court martialled and in the brig. We’ll be stuck in this shithole for the rest of our lives. You know that all we can do is wait and play this by ear. We may still be able to get there, but you have to stay calm for a while”. He pulled at Bones’ arm. “Please Bones, don’t go steaming in”.

“Are you seriously telling me to calm down? You?” Bones looked at him incredulously, the reversal of their usual positions throwing him off balance.

“I guess I am”, Jim said. “But you know I’m right, and I don’t - Bones, you’ve been sick. Please don’t do anything that’s going to make you sick again. Let them get their little camp set up and then we can see if we can talk our way round things”.

“Jesus, Jim, when did you become the sensible one?” Bones stopped both his tirade and his stalk away from the camp. He looked down and sighed hugely and Jim stepped forward. “I hate this. I hate being off balance like this”.

“I know”, Jim said. “Don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this, but that’s fine, you know that you can do whatever you want in front of me and I won’t ever care, won’t ever judge. If you’re going to get sick or confused or what-the-fuck-ever, do it in front of me, okay?”

Bones wrapped Jim in a huge bear hug. “Okay”, he whispered. “You’re a good man, James Kirk. Glad you’re mine”.

Jim didn’t answer, for once keeping the smart remarks to himself. Now wasn’t the time. Bones was the vulnerable one now, and that was something that Jim had never seen. The last thing he needed was a smart mouthed partner.

“Come on”, he said after a long moment. “We need to go back”. 

“Yeah, you’re right”. Bones turned around and began to retrace their steps, one arm wrapped firmly around Jim’s shoulders. It was only natural that Jim should slip his own arm around Bones’ waist and together they made their way back.

The camp was set up, although to Jim’s eyes it looked a little - ramshackle, like the people who had done it knew the theory but had never had much chance to practice. He had to contend with another near-explosion when Bones found out that a party had gone into Homestead, and he came very close to getting punched when he stepped too close, too quickly, but then Bones realised what had nearly happened and was so horrified that he simply sat on the steps of the nearest transport and rested his head in his hands.

“Don’t feel guilty about that”, Jim said, dropping to his knees. “I brought that one right on myself. Should know better than to approach a wild animal without warning”.

“Don’t say it was your fault. Don’t blame yourself for something that I almost did to you”. Bones looked aghast. “Jesus, I almost hit you”.

“No you didn’t”, Jim said. “I know what almost being hit is like, and that was nowhere near it. You just reacted. Don’t get eaten up by it. Let’s just say we’re equally to blame and forget it”. Jim cupped Bones’ face. “Oh my Bones, this isn’t like you. Come on, what’s wrong? I need you to be strong to keep me straight. Tell me what I can do”.

“I’m just so fucking tired, Jim”, Bones admitted. “I just want to sleep”.

“Okay”. Jim sat back on his heels, gazing thoughtfully at Bones. “Listen, and don’t get mad at me. I want us to go back to Omega”. He held up a hand as Bones opened his mouth. “Hear me out. You’re sick, you need help, or at the very least, rest. They’re not going to let you down into Homestead, that much is obvious. You’ve given them your report and you’ve also logged everything. Vasquez can stay if he wants, and he’s seen as much as you”. He leaned forward. “I know, I know that this goes against everything in your body, that you never want to do this, to leave people who need you, but Bones, you’re not going to be allowed to treat them, you know that”.

Bones opened his mouth again, and then nodded. “I know. I just don’t want to admit it, but yes, you’re right”.

“So, let’s get you back, get you fixed. Then when you’re fit again we can come back out”. Jim shifted forward again. “It makes sense. What is it you say? _Physician, heal thyself._ So fix thyself, and then we can help other people. I don’t want you sick, my Bones. I can’t handle you being sick. I need you strong and beautiful and protective”.

“It’s defeat, Jim”.

“No, no it isn’t”, Jim responded immediately. “It’s concession. You’ll just be stuck here, unable to do your job and hating everything and everybody because of it. We go back to Omega, you can maybe even work in the hospital there”.

“And what about you?”

“Not about me”. Jim shook his head. “We can’t both be fucked up at the same time, can you imagine the disaster that would be?” He felt his shoulders relax sightly as he saw Bones’ lips twitch in acknowledgement, and he pressed his advantage. “So will you let me talk to whoever’s in charge? We can travel back with the secure transport taking the captain and Comms”. He lowered his voice. “And we can be there when Starfleet arrive”. He smiled. “We are such sneaky bastards”.

“Well, you are”, Bones agreed. He was silent for another moment, and then he nodded. “Okay, head and heart. Head says you’re right in everything you’ve said; I could work in the medical centres back in the capital; I can’t do anything here; Vasquez is here; I’ve logged everything. Heart? Fuck no, this goes against every micron of my training. But then, also heart: it’s what you want, and that’s pretty much my reason for living right now”.

Jim smiled, utterly dazzled by the emotions those words conveyed. “So make me happy”, he finally managed to say. “I’ll be happy when you’re not sick anymore, when my Bones is back to rag on me and shout at me”.

Bones was silent for another moment, and then he nodded. “Okay, you’re right. We’ll clear it and go back”.

TBC


End file.
